


athena and arachne

by HPLovecraftHadAPetPony



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, there's nothing too explicit in this but it does have meteor gamzee so yknow bewarb
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-26 16:46:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13861770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPLovecraftHadAPetPony/pseuds/HPLovecraftHadAPetPony
Summary: "There are many who don't wish to sleep for fear of nightmares. Sadly, there are many who don't wish to wake for the same fear." -Richelle E. GoodrichThe dreambubbles are a limbo of trauma and nostalgia, and the vision burns brighter when out of the sun.





	athena and arachne

••••••

You are in limbo when you first get your eyes back. It doesn't feel like regaining a sense. It feels like you've been given a new one. Cursed with new knowledge. The electric teal tendrils that halo your head are jealous that their Seer was hurt in this manner by something other by them. They are jealous, but not surprised. Light players seldom miss the opportunity to abuse their power.

Aranea is, naturally, the first thing you see. With new clarity, you can no longer pretend that she is someone else. You do not have time to analyze how this makes you feel because you are busy passing out. 

~~~~

You wake up in a very specific memory. There is nothing special about it, but your mind keeps coming back to it like a battered woman. You regret the simile as soon as you come up with it, but the scene persists. 

Vriska is at the helm, lazily steering you two home. You lean against the mast, biting against the coins to see if they are real but also because you enjoy doing so. That's always been a thing. 

"Are we going back to your hive?" You ask her with your mouth full and words punctuated with the sounds of a coin purse.

"Uh, yeah, duh!" She replies. You can practically hear the eight shoutpoles. When you don't reply, she turns to you with her eyes wide.

"That's what you want to do, right?" Her mood changes dramatically.

"Nah, it's fine," you reassure her, "why don't we ever go to my hive, though?" 

"I've been to your hive before," she protests.

"Like once! I've had a million sleepovers at your house and we haven't even had one at mine," you whine.

"Oh, so what? Maybe it's because my house is so much cooler than yours."

"You're just jealous that I live in a tree and you don't!"

The ship creaks when you say the word "jealous". You two hardly ever mention it. Or, well, you want to hardly ever mention it. In actuality, you accuse each other of being jealous almost every day. It's like a ritual, a regiment of not letting each other in:  
"I don't think you're better than me. In fact, I know I'm a lot better than you! You think so too, don't you? Everyone thinks so. So, actually, you're the loser, sister."

The dialogue is persistent. Still, both of you know how pathetic it is. You give it up. She does not.

"Hah! Who wants to live in a treehouse? What are you, some kind of...tree creature?"

"Vriska."

"Yeah! What do you do, peck holes in it? Eat bananas?"

"That is the least scathing burn I've ever heard."

"Whatever! Do you want to come to my house or not?"

"I do want to go. I like your house. It's just...your mom."

"What? What's wrong with my mom?"

"Nothing, Mindfang. Forget it."

She looks back at you, her eyes wide with worry. You smile back at her. Your eyes meet. Oh fuck. Your eyes.

Vriska disappears and you aren't 3 anymore.

You're in a different memory, one more punishing. Overhead, the sky pulses menacingly. Chalk drawings surround you. Just as you register  
where you are, the voice appears too.

“It won't bring her back, Seer.”

Blue-blooded bitch. You don't write a reply, but she continues anyway.

“I don't see why you would go to such lengths, even if it did. You couldn't stand the competition. Talk of an inferiority complex.”

She's less elegant, more mean. The dream bubble rules aren’t exactly clear to you, but you gather than she isn't actually here. It doesn't matter. Her words really don't matter. That's what you tell yourself, what you write on the wall. You want to believe it.

•••••

You don't believe it for more than a week. Gamzee doesn't ever spare you that sort of thing. 

You two don't fight in public. You can't remember the last time you saw Gamzee in public. He's practically an imaginary friend, except for the part where you hate each other so much that you fight on sight. At the beginning of your relationship, he held himself back. You beat him so easily you wondered how Nepeta ever died. By now, you don't wonder so much. He has you pinned to the wall within seconds. The worst part is, you can tell that he's still holding back. It's only a tiny fraction of what he's capable of. He knows that you know and he rubs his bulge at the thought of it. You hate him for that. He knows that, too.

He makes your fucking skin crawl sometimes, but you can take it. It's harder to take when he makes you cry. You have enough pride to not do it in front of him - or at least when you think he's not close. When he does see you cry, he mocks you relentlessly for that as any true jester would. It's actually less painful when you can argue with him while crying. As horrible as he is to you, you are worse to yourself. Being alone with your thoughts and his on-the-mark insults is something you wouldn't wish on anyone. You stay isolated anyway. 

You stay isolated far longer than you should, neglecting to shower or eat or do anything except sleep. You know you're sinking further into a spiral. The only thing you do now is watch old memories. Yes, your vision and her life are not connected in the way you hoped for. She does not come around. As more cracks in space appear and more bubbles burst, you begin to wonder if she ever will.

**Author's Note:**

> 1.) I was really miserable when writing this and unknowingly surround by lizards and roaches. I was outside so it wasn't as bad as it could've been but isn't that fucked up? 
> 
> 2.) Idk if I'm gonna finish this but I want to write more vrisrezi, maybe a closeted hs au
> 
> 3.) s/o to the ladystuck tarot. as a certified lesbian and a certified tarot reader I am thrilled.


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